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rantin on a tuesday afternoon |
2002-04-30 |
i'm going to the coast again this weekend. i like to say "coast" rather than "beach" cause then i can act like a new england yuppie going to the "shore." then, it's off to d.c. for a star-studded, probably uneventful event which will hopefully allow me to see my homegirl T and her new little babe Selah. then, two not-so-action-packed weekends at home on me arse before packing up for a weekend of chiggers and smoke inhalation on the majestic Ocracoke Island. since i'll be in d.c. on mother's day i have to send my mama a big bouquet of bout-to-die flowers so she won't consider me a heretic and have me hanged for not paying tribute to her. i know two people in my life who think they are China and therefore must be paid tribute/cherished/put on a pedestal/otherwise treated like a princess which means coming First in all respects and believing they are somehow above it all. my mother is the worst. i am slowly prying her thumb off my life, but it's a delicate process complete with the requisite "you're ungrateful"s and "after all my sacrifice"s... i'm tired of having to play marionette simply because my mother gave birth to me. that was her fault. she should've either protected herself or not had sex. she did neither of those things and somehow it's MY problem she "gave up so much." uh, no. sorry, ma, but that ain't working no more. it's been a long 25 years of birth-guilt, but i'm officially over it. i'm tellin all y'all: from here on out, you love me as i am and for who i am - or you get the fuck out of my life. no more two stepping and walking on egg shells to please those who couldn't care less about making ME happy, yet who expect me to live my life for them. can i get an amen, sistah?
you got something to say?
this is today's entry
playing:
reading: White Teeth
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